DARKER MY LOVE: THE MANNEQUIN GOT ME ROCK HARD
Darker My Love “Two Ways Out”
Darker My Love played the very first L.A. RECORD X-Mas party in a parking lot full of abandoned couches. They have just released their second album 2.
Why were you sleeping in an animal crematorium when you first came to L.A.?
Jared Everett (guitar/vocals): There was nowhere else to go. Literally. We were forced to walk out to Sun Valley and sleep in a crematorium.
Is that the most corpses you’ve ever woken up next to?
Rob Barbato (bass/vocals): When I first lived here I lived in a room we called the Mexican prison.
Was there a handcuffed college kid and a pound of weed?
RB: Cinderblock walls and a bathroom that was no more than a drain.
Andy Granelli (drums): A lightbulb hanging from a cord.
Tim Presley (guitar/vocals): And constant water dripping.
What song did you write there?
TP: Ironically—‘I Feel Fine,’ maybe.
RB: Which is a sarcastic statement.
Which is the most sarcastic song on the new album?
RB: ‘Blue Day.’ ‘It’s so nice, it’s so beautiful.’
Was Gorefest ’07 the ultimate Darker My Love performance?
RB: That was our shining moment. We locked down Texas.
What did we miss by not being there?
AG: Crystal meth.
Did you play faster?
AG: You’re suspended in time. You aren’t faster or slower—you’re just there.
What is the biggest difference between this record and the last?
TP: We took time on this one.
What effect did that have?
RB: The record is a little longer.
Why did you tell MTV you almost purchased a space alien in Philadelphia?
RB: Oh, where we almost got Blix? That was the biggest bad move on our part. We found a baby alien—a half-human half-alien.
AG: Picture this—we’re in Philly with nothing to do because we’re getting the van serviced for hours, and we run across this—a human baby-doll body but a baby alien head, and its name is Blix. Twenty bucks. Also simultaneously without each of us knowing it we got boners off a mannequin in the same aisle. We were all kind of staring at the mannequin, and as it turned out—Blix was cool but the mannequin really got me rock hard.
TP: Maybe it’s a good thing we didn’t get Blix after that.
What was Dave Cooley most excited about during the making of your album?
TP: Probably when we were done.
Did he cry, hug you, or run away?
TP: He ran fast.
AG: We’re still not done.
Can people bring each album purchased back to the studio for one final mix?
AG: Yes—every album sold.
Jared, why did you say this album is a hitchhiker’s guide to L.A.?
JE: Everyone keeps bringing that up. No one will let it go. For me—I didn’t like living in L.A. It was a struggle. That was my way through it. Making that record.
Have you reconciled with your environment?
JE: Yeah, it’s cool. It’s hot.
That will be our headline.
JE: ‘It’s cool. It’s hot.’ That’s a slow-burner on that one.
RB: Tell him the story when you chased down that car in the van and then gave them a ride home.
JE: I was driving the van and had a real bad day—long story—but some girl ran into the van and hit it really hard and dented the fender. And she faked pulling over but peeled out, and I chased her down. A 1993 conversion van—sliding around turns, ramming her from behind—she had like a Honda or something. Finally she stopped and all these kids ran out—‘Holy shit, mister! Your car’s really fast!’ I ended up giving one of them a ride somewhere.
How did you go from rage to kindness so fast?
JE: I wasn’t even mad. I just wanted her to pull over.
TP: It’s like how the Joker and Batman are—you need that chase.
Is that the best way you ever met a girl?
RB: Next question.
What happened to the Lee Hazlewood cover you recorded?
Will Canzoneri (keys): Yeah, what happened to it?
AG: Some lady ran into it and then took off.
Is that the most intense combat situation the band has been in?
RB: Andy had a fireworks fight with Agnostic Front.
TP: Vinnie Stigma almost shot one in my face. Or was it Roger Miret?
What’s it like to see the killing gleam in Vinnie Stigma’s eye?
AG: All you gotta do is look any of those guys in the face. It never leaves.
TP: If they shot us, it’d be for laughs. If we hit them, we’d get our ass kicked.
AG: They’d smile because we gave them some pain, and then they’d give some pain back to us.
What did you have to leave off this record that you wish you put in?
RB: ‘Pharoah Sanders’ Tomb’ song.
TP: My vote is ‘Fresh Cream.’
Do you have a bunch of songs about things people should be listening to?
TP: Yeah—one called ‘Appetite for Destruction.’ Really killer.
AG: Another one called ‘The White Album.’
What interviewer is most fun to fuck with so far?
TP: You never know who’s fucking with who, really.
What is the tenderest moment you ever shared with Mark E. Smith?
TP: Probably the laugh after me and him jumped a promoter.
RB: We were in a hotel room and the promoter had given Mark’s wife a copy of a Nico CD, and Mark got all pissed. And he was kind of joking around—‘Let’s go get him!’ So Tim and Mark—the evil twins—they ran down and Tim knocked on the door, and he came to the door naked and they punched him in the face. And came back laughing like little girls.
But don’t you worry that the next day Mark E. Smith might be punching you?
TP: Nah, I don’t think he’d ever punch me.
Famous last words.
TP: I know.
What’s it like when you first walk into Monoman’s apartment?
JE: Cluttered. Nothing makes its way out of there. Not even trash.
RB: When you walk up, he’d move stuff from behind the door. You’d enter one at a time.
JE: And slide back for the next person. You had to shimmy sideways down the hallway. I noticed he had these parrots that would sit on his back—like a pirate—and shit all over his back, and against the back wall were like racing stripes. Greenish brown. I finally put it together.
Are you worried the video is a bit Rob-centric?
RB: It was all editing.
What’s it like to see a band made up of all Rob Barbatos?
TP: A dream come true.
RB: Weird. A hairy situation.
What is your band’s most hidden charm?
AG: I don’t know if we can hide it!
Where did you get your case of genre paranoia?
AG: It’s normal reasonable thinking. How many times can you hear the term ‘fuzzed-out guitars’?
How many times can I write it?
RB: That should be the whole interview—‘FUZZED-OUT GUITARS, FUZZED-OUT GUITARS!’
TP: I also have a problem with the whole ‘psychedelic’ movement. Everyone is psychedelic now. It’s like the new punk. It’s literally turning into that Frank Zappa song—‘Who Needs The Peace Corps?’ There’s nothing wrong with that type of music but—it’s an easy tag. As easy as punk.
You already burned punk in a different article.
AG: Yeah, but they like that shit.
TP: Isn’t that punk to do that?
Are you on a first-name basis with the Southwest flight attendants from flying Andy back and forth from San Francisco so much?
RB: The other day when we were flying to Seattle for the Capitol Hill block party, the security lady was like—‘Oh my God, aren’t you in the Distillers?’ At six in the morning. And Andy was like, ‘Yeah, nice to meet you!’
AG: ‘So is it cool if I take this pound of weed on the plane or what?’
What’s the worst thing that ever happened to your equipment?
AG: All of it got stolen. Stealing a band’s gear is like stealing a one-legged man’s peg-leg. Stealing a toothless old lady’s dentures.
Got one more?
AG: Stealing a sex addict’s boner.
Are there more boners in this interview than anyone else got?
DARKER MY LOVE WITH TWEAK BIRD, AMNION AND EULOGIES ON THUR., AUG. 7, AT THE TROUBADOUR, 9081 SANTA MONICA BLVD., WEST HOLLYWOOD. 8 PM / $10 / ALL AGES. TROUBADOUR.COM. DARKER MY LOVE’S 2 RELEASES TUE., AUG. 5, ON DANGERBIRD. VISIT DARKER MY LOVE AT DARKERMYDUDES.BLOGSPOT.COM OR MYSPACE.COM/DARKERMYLOVE.